Starred Review This compelling and gut-wrenchingly honest memoir reads like a car wreck that's impossible to turn away from as Kuehnert recounts how she survived an extremely destructive adolescence. As a child in Oak Park, Illinois, Kuehnert idolized book characters Laura Ingalls Wilder and Ramona Quimby and yearned to write of experiences like theirs but didn't think her life was interesting enough. That would change by the time she was in high school. Kuehnert says she started cutting in seventh grade: "I thought [it] did a lot less damage than people." She created her own poetry zine in high school, and pages ripped from those zines and her diaries illustrate this mesmerizing memoir. Telling chapter headings ("Boys Will Be . . .", "Girls Will Be. . .", "True Bad Romance") describe the female friends she made (and fought with) and the toxic, sexually abusive relationships she endured in high school with Greg and, later in college, with narcissistic Simon, 24, who started dating her when she was only 17. She developed an eating disorder while dating Greg and survived substance abuse with Simon, sometimes explicitly depicted relationships she likens to Sid and Nancy and F. Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald. Exposito's line illustrations add weight to Kuehnert's harrowing but ultimately triumphant and hopeful life story for mature teen readers.

Via a strong, captivating voice, Kuehnert spins a kaleidoscopic tale of girlhood, starting when she moves to Oak Park, Ill., at age eight and leading up to her preoccupation with the 1990s riot grrrl movement and beyond. Her tumultuous and traumatic first relationship anchors the narrative, and vignettes depicting this abusive period, instances of self-harm, substance reliance, and depression juxtapose humorous stories of attempting to summon George Washington via Ouija board, falling in love with Nirvana, calling people’s pagers, and reading Francesca Lia Block’s Weetzie Bat. Through oscillating streams of consciousness and journal-esque recounting of events, Kuehnert crafts an arc of her formative years, replete with a curation of comics, diary entries, mixtape lists, photographs, teen poetry, and zine pages in a compulsively readable mixed-media collage of grungy aesthetics and 90s paraphernalia. The result is a memoir with sharp teeth and a soft underbelly, the product mirroring the author’s catharsis in creating art: “As broken and aching as I may have felt inside while I wrote and cut and pasted and photocopied and assembled, the sliver of a belief surfaced that I had the power to make myself whole again.” Ages 14–up. (Mar.) ■

Gr 9 Up —A vulnerable memoir recounting Kuehnert's teen life in the 1990s. Including excerpts from her zines and journals, as well as comic-style illustrations, she explores the music scenes and relationships that shaped her as well as the abuse that she survived. Kuehnert begins her narrative from a young age, realizing she was a writer and storyteller with the acquisition of a Ramona Quimby journal. This sets the stage for the unfolding of her early friendships, as she moves to Oak Park, IL, and desperately tries to fit in. The memoir progresses semi-linearly as she discovers Nirvana, makes new friends, and has her first romantic relationship. The shifts back in time can be confusing, but the heart of the story about growth and the trauma experienced at the hands of her abusive boyfriend link the vignettes. There are continual references to '90s culture and the punk/goth/grunge scenes which might appeal to a very specific audience, though may appeal to younger audiences with an interest in the time and music. Further, there are references to sexual abuse and drug use that could be triggering for some. VERDICT An authentic window into the lives of adolescents with grit and heart, likely for a niche audience.—Kaitlin Malixi