Starred Review ALA Booklist

Starred Review To be fair, Bianca Torre is not afraid of everything st a long list of very specific things. These fears have caused them to live as a shut-in, more or less, with their only forays to the outside world being high school and weekend meetings with the local birdwatching club. Otherwise, Bianca experiences life vicariously by using their birding telescope to watch their neighbors. This habit gets the teen into real trouble one night when Bianca inadvertently witnesses one of their neighbors being murdered. With the help of Anderson, their only friend, Bianca embarks on a mission to discover the neighbor's killer, but they're not prepared for how deep the conspiracy behind the murder goes or how much their investigation will endanger them and the people they love. Smart, witty, and daring, this debut is a fast-paced whodunit-conspiracy story with a strong subplot following Bianca's journey to better understand where they fit on the gender spectrum. Bianca is a wonderful character who shares their hilarious observations of the world and works through their own issues with a healthy sense of humor. Their relationship with Anderson is at the core of the story, and the friends' banter is one of the book's highlights. The plot is a standout as well, escalating into absurdity and a wild finish without collapsing into itself.

Kirkus Reviews

An anxious teen solves a murder mystery.Bianca keeps a running list of things to be afraid of: public speaking (#1), sheep (#24), opening up to strangers (#37), and ringworm (#118), to name a few. But when the White 16-year-old witnesses a real-life murder in the course of pursuing a semi-innocent hobby (spying on North Hollywood neighbors with a telescope), Bianca has to face a healthy chunk of those fears. Teaming up with charming, geeky neighbor and friend Anderson; Anderson's trans brother, Ronan, (both of whom are Black); and Bianca's Chinese American crush, Elaine, they unravel a series of clues that eventually lead to an incredibly strange cult linked to embezzlement from a number of local institutions. Meanwhile, Bianca is also untangling some questions of gender identity and sexuality, mostly by scrolling through terms and definitions online and contemplating what words make the most sense. Most of these introspective interludes feel awkwardly and didactically wedged in rather than engagingly explored through a compelling teen voice. Minus the murderous conspiracy-driven cult, most of the characters come across as carefully drawn sketches of supportive friends and family, with almost identically scripted one-note reactions to Bianca's coming out.A mostly suspenseful hike through self-discovery and saving the day. (Mystery. 13-17)

Publishers Weekly (Fri Oct 06 00:00:00 CDT 2023)

Sixteen-year-old white lesbian Bianca Torre thought they had enough on their plate dealing with their “full CVS-receipt-long list of fears,” a burgeoning gender identity crisis, and a massive crush on a girl they’re too scared to talk to (“Fear #13: Beautiful Women”). But when the death of their conspiracy-obsessed neighbor is ruled a suicide, Bianca feels compelled to add “solve a murder mystery” to their accounting of troubles. Especially because their bird-watching—and people-watching—habit resulted in them being the sole witness to their neighbor’s murder by a knife-wielding stranger wearing a beaked plague doctor mask. With the help of their Black best friend Anderson Coleman and their Chinese American crush Elaine Yee, Bianca embarks on an investigation to find the culprit despite “Fear #3: Murder.” But as the trio delve further into their inquiry, Bianca must drum up the courage to push past “Fear #26: Dangerous situations in general”—or risk jeopardizing their loved ones. Via Bianca’s savvy teenage voice, punctuated by humor both whip-smart and absurdly campy, Winans portrays Bianca’s gender exploration and timid steps toward bravery with as much heft as the narrative’s deliberately plotted overarching mystery in this exuberant read. Ages 14–up. Agent: Jordan Hamessley, New Leaf Literary and Media. (Apr.)

School Library Journal (Wed Nov 01 00:00:00 CDT 2023)

Gr 9 Up —A highly anxious teen with a long list of fears is forced to tackle them all at once (and add new ones) when they witness the murder (Fear of a neighbor. Birdwatcher Bianca, a white nonbinary lesbian not yet out to their parents (Fear ), teams up with their neighbor and only real life friend, Anderson, who is Black, to investigate a murder, which Bianca saw through a telescope. They quickly discover that the murder was not random but linked to a local cult, and follow the clues their neighbor left behind, facing peril at every turn. Working with Bianca's crush, Chinese American Elaine, and a few others, the only way the murder will get solved is if Bianca can do things like break into a dead guy's apartment (Fear ), initiate conversations (Fear , and get out of an awful lot of dangerous situations (Fear ). Fast-paced and well written, the story is as much about finding joy in exploring and discovering one's identity as it is about a cult and conspiracy. Full of charming and quick-witted characters, even secondary characters, like the up-for-anything stoner Ryan and Anderson's trans brother, Ronan, shine. Winans makes this murder investigation heartwarming and is the perfect vehicle for Bianca's growth and bravery, showing them they can't let their fears hold them back (Fear ). VERDICT A suspenseful and satisfying thriller with plenty of heart and humor.—Amanda MacGregor