Starred Review ALA Booklist (Tue Jan 03 00:00:00 CST 2023)

Starred Review Miller's heartfelt debut novel tackles difficult subjects with a bold mix of magical realism, tender empathy, and candor. Matt, 16, lives in a rural upstate New York town with a single mother who slaughters hogs at the local processing plant. Matt is desperate because his beloved older sister, Maya, has left home, supposedly to record an album with her punk band, although he fears she's met a worse fate at the hands of a group of high-school bullies led by handsome Tariq, an object of desire for both Matt and Maya. Feeling powerless, Matt realizes he can maintain control over one thing: the calories he consumes. As he restricts his food intake, Matt feels his other senses sharpen to the point where he believes he has superpowers, hearing and seeing other people's thoughts, and influencing others with his own commands. Matt is delusional and anorexic, but he's also an admirably strong character who is out and proud, brilliant, creative, and determined to survive. It's not always easy to find novels with troubled gay male protagonists who aren't doomed, and Miller's creative portrait of a complex and sympathetic individual will provide a welcome mirror for kindred spirits.

Starred Review for Kirkus Reviews (Tue Jan 03 00:00:00 CST 2023)

A bullied gay boy harnesses trippy, starvation-induced powers to avenge the disappearance of his beloved sister. Gay, Jewish, white, self-deprecating Matt hates his name but hasn't changed it because honesty is the best policy. And he is honest, quickly establishing that he has suicidal thoughts and homicidal reveries and his family is at the bottom of the financial food chain. That forthright tongue isn't fully reflective though, refusing to admit that his body dysmorphia and calorie counting = eating disorder. When he discovers that extreme starvation heightens his senses, the world around him begins to clarify (he can follow scents like a hound and read minds like a clairvoyant as his body slowly degenerates). Convinced that a triptych of king bullies, one of whom is dark and dreamy Middle Eastern Tariq, on whom he hates having a massive crush, is responsible for the disappearance of his older sister, Matt focuses his supernatural gift on them, hoping both to find his sister and to systematically destroy the high school ruling class—even if Tariq might secretly be into him. In first-person journal format, Matt schools readers on the art of starving as he toes the line between expiration and enlightenment, sparing no detail of his twisted, antagonistic relationship with his body. Matt's sarcastic, biting wit keeps readers rooting for him and hoping for his recovery. In his acknowledgments, Miller reveals the story's roots in his own teen experiences. A dark and lovely tale of supernatural vengeance and self-destruction. (Fiction. 14-18)

Kirkus Reviews (Fri Oct 04 00:00:00 CDT 2024)

A bullied gay boy harnesses trippy, starvation-induced powers to avenge the disappearance of his beloved sister. Gay, Jewish, white, self-deprecating Matt hates his name but hasn't changed it because honesty is the best policy. And he is honest, quickly establishing that he has suicidal thoughts and homicidal reveries and his family is at the bottom of the financial food chain. That forthright tongue isn't fully reflective though, refusing to admit that his body dysmorphia and calorie counting = eating disorder. When he discovers that extreme starvation heightens his senses, the world around him begins to clarify (he can follow scents like a hound and read minds like a clairvoyant as his body slowly degenerates). Convinced that a triptych of king bullies, one of whom is dark and dreamy Middle Eastern Tariq, on whom he hates having a massive crush, is responsible for the disappearance of his older sister, Matt focuses his supernatural gift on them, hoping both to find his sister and to systematically destroy the high school ruling class—even if Tariq might secretly be into him. In first-person journal format, Matt schools readers on the art of starving as he toes the line between expiration and enlightenment, sparing no detail of his twisted, antagonistic relationship with his body. Matt's sarcastic, biting wit keeps readers rooting for him and hoping for his recovery. In his acknowledgments, Miller reveals the story's roots in his own teen experiences. A dark and lovely tale of supernatural vengeance and self-destruction. (Fiction. 14-18)

Publishers Weekly (Fri Oct 06 00:00:00 CDT 2023)

Matt, a gay high school junior, is bent on uncovering the reason his older sister, Maya, suddenly left town after meeting up with senior soccer star Tariq. Certain that something happened between Maya and Tariq, Matt works to earn Tariq-s trust, ignoring his own attraction to him while planning his revenge. Though Matt insists that he doesn-t have an eating disorder, he limits his food intake, believing the hunger sharpens his senses and allows him to see beyond the facade of everyday life. Each chapter opens with Matt-s rules detailing the -art of starving,- and readers will realize the depth of his dangerous downward spiral straightaway. Believing -if someone knows what you want, they can hurt you in all sorts of ways,- Matt is a master at suppressing his urges, but there is nothing romantic about debut novelist Miller-s portrayal of anorexia; his descriptions are often graphic and disturbing, and discussion of Matt-s future is brutally honest. As Matt-s body deteriorates and his -powers- reach new levels, readers must decide for themselves what is and isn-t real. Ages 13-up. Agent: Seth Fishman, Gernert Company. (July)

Voice of Youth Advocates (Tue Jan 03 00:00:00 CST 2023)

Matt is following his rule book on the art of starving. He does not think of himself as having an eating disorder because he does not binge and purge; he thinks that not eating has given him superpowers that will help him track down the truth about why his older sister left town and help him get revenge on Tariq, who helped her leave, and Tariq’s friends, the school star athletes and bullies. As things progress, Matt finds out that nothing is quite as he thought; Maya left home to meet their father, and Tariq shares the same secret as Matt —he is gay. Their burgeoning relationship makes Matt happy which dulls his sensory acuteness, so he eats even less, trying to keep his edge. His admission about the eating disorder ends the romantic relationship. Anger about his mother losing her job at the slaughterhouse after years of loyal service and a promise of a promotion in the down-sized organization leads Matt to release all the pigs awaiting slaughter, leading them, Pied Piper-like, to rampage though their small, depressed town. Matt’s collapse that night leads to weeks of inpatient hospitalization and a gradual return to a brighter outlook.
Books about eating disorders among male teens are few and while needed, this will not be hugely popular. The magical realism of the novel may appeal to some readers, but others will find it confusing and wonder if he truly has powers or if all of the incidents are figments of Matt’s imagination. The almost bloated nature of the prose is in direct opposition to the subject matter, and is the reason the novel will struggle to find a wide readership. Place in collections where books on eating disorders are needed.—Suanne B. Roush.