Starred Review ALA Booklist

Starred Review Elise Dembowski will not be unfamiliar to readers. The girl most likely to be picked on. A halfhearted suicide attempt. Broken family, no friends, no future. But then something happens. While wandering the streets one night, Elise comes across a warehouse party. The joint is jumping, and to Elise's amazement, some of the people there are interested in her. Vicky, a singer, takes Elise under her wing, and Char, the amazing DJ, takes her to bed. But Char does something for Elise that's more important than making her feel attractive: he tutors her in the art of DJing, and, it turns out, Elise is a natural. So much so that she soon outshines her mentor. What sets this apart from so many problem novels is how honestly and deeply Sales probes the life of a miserable 16-year-old, from her cringe-worthy attempt at learning how to be popular to the observational, rather than emotional, look at what it feels like to be with a guy. Readers will be fascinated and touched by the first-person voice because of what is roiling beneath it. Whether Elise is cynical, despairing, or even exhilarated, her hurt and confusion are the feelings that underlie everything, and teens will connect with her viscerally. That Elise finds something that awakens and restores her will also give readers hope.

Starred Review for Kirkus Reviews (Thu Apr 28 00:00:00 CDT 2022)

Elise Dembowski is a chronic overachiever. Her project for sophomore year is to finally fit in. When this fails and Elise discovers that she is still the same as she's always been, she makes a desperate decision--a suicide attempt--that ostracizes her even further. After this incident, Elise takes to walking alone at night, which is how she stumbles across Start, an underground dance party. There, she meets a cast of characters who help her begin to see the light at the end of the crushingly dark and seemingly endless tunnel that is high school. Elise begins living a double life, returning each week to Start and learning to DJ. The alluring but elusive DJ Char takes her under his wing and helps her develop her talent. When a cyberbully dredges up Elise's past and begins attacking her via a fraudulent online journal, Elise's passion for DJ'ing becomes her refuge. Her secrets eventually become impossible to maintain, forcing her to come clean about who she is and who she wants to be. Elise is a remarkably self-aware character. Her journey toward acceptance--of others and of herself--is compelling. The supporting characters are equally well-developed, with the strengths and flaws of real people. Sales' narrative, rich with diverse music references, reverberates with resilience. Pulsates with hope for all the misfits. (Fiction. 14-18)

Horn Book

After a disastrous attempt to make friends her first day of sophomore year, Elise cuts herself with an X-Acto knife, a "practice" attempt at suicide. Seven months later, she happens upon a weekly underground dance club, a discovery that changes her life. Lively, authentic dialogue and a bevy of fully developed supporting characters complete this sardonic, frequently hilarious, insightful celebration of individuality.

Kirkus Reviews (Fri Oct 04 00:00:00 CDT 2024)

Elise Dembowski is a chronic overachiever. Her project for sophomore year is to finally fit in. When this fails and Elise discovers that she is still the same as she's always been, she makes a desperate decision--a suicide attempt--that ostracizes her even further. After this incident, Elise takes to walking alone at night, which is how she stumbles across Start, an underground dance party. There, she meets a cast of characters who help her begin to see the light at the end of the crushingly dark and seemingly endless tunnel that is high school. Elise begins living a double life, returning each week to Start and learning to DJ. The alluring but elusive DJ Char takes her under his wing and helps her develop her talent. When a cyberbully dredges up Elise's past and begins attacking her via a fraudulent online journal, Elise's passion for DJ'ing becomes her refuge. Her secrets eventually become impossible to maintain, forcing her to come clean about who she is and who she wants to be. Elise is a remarkably self-aware character. Her journey toward acceptance--of others and of herself--is compelling. The supporting characters are equally well-developed, with the strengths and flaws of real people. Sales' narrative, rich with diverse music references, reverberates with resilience. Pulsates with hope for all the misfits. (Fiction. 14-18)

Publishers Weekly (Fri Oct 06 00:00:00 CDT 2023)

Elise has endured a lifetime of social isolation and bullying at school. Walking alone one night soon after a halfhearted suicide attempt, the 16-year-old inadvertently ends up at an underground nightclub. There, an aspiring musician befriends her, and she catches the eye of Char, a cute DJ who agrees to teach her to mix music. But as talented, driven Elise spends more nights sneaking out to learn how to DJ (and kiss Char), her double life spins out of control. Elise is a complex, well-drawn character, and it-s easy to relate to her sense of feeling like an outsider (-There are so many rules that you don-t know, and no matter how much you study, you can-t learn them all-). Sales (Past Perfect) fills her third YA novel with honest insights about high school-s cruel politics, tender conversations between Elise and her equally struggling parents, and visceral descriptions of life as a DJ: -It felt like invisible veins and arteries ran between me and every person in that room, communicating information between us instantly and noiselessly.- Ages 12-up. Agent: Stephen Barbara, Foundry Literary + Media. (Sept.)

School Library Journal

Gr 9 Up-A razor-sharp and honest view of a misfit trying to find her place in the world. For most of her life, Elise has tried to make friends, but nothing ever seemed to work and she always finds herself on the outside of everything. The summer before her sophomore year, she studies up on current trends and fashion in one last-ditch effort to be accepted. But when it goes horribly wrong, she attempts suicide but realizes that she isn't serious about it. When she has trouble sleeping, she goes on long walks, and one night she happens upon a hidden dance club. An avid music lover, Elise feels that she has finally found a place to fit in with the kids in the club and the DJ playing the music. But her road to acceptance and freedom isn't smooth, and through the bumps along the way she finally finds who she's meant to be. Elise is smart and funny and very relatable. Her love of music is a huge part of her story, and there are many references to bands and songs throughout, so some teens will take to this book and love it. Others might not be interested enough to follow Elise on her journey of self-acceptance. Necia Blundy, formerly at Marlborough Public Library, MA